This Figure Is Broken

This is Blasphemy

Time for a confession, I have never seen any Back to the Futures and I’ve never sat through all of Ferris Buellers Day Off.  These are things I must do before I die lol.

It Has Started,

I’m now on day two and I’m still feeling okay, the plan I’ve made has really helped out.  All the preparations are paying off and I couldn’t be happier.  I’m not going to come right out and say what I’m quitting but if you know what I’ve struggled with for almost the past 2 years then you know what it is.  I’m sorry for lying about it for so long now and saying I was off but now I really am done.  So if your mad at me for lying then understand it was the only way I could keep you guys as friends and not having you hate me.  So with that said I hope you can just be happy that I’m done with this for good and please be supportive of this decision.

A New Little Rant

So I’m done being the door mat everyone walks over.  I’m through with being treated like trash.  If you start to use me because I try to be a nice person, I’m will to write you off.  You will become completely disassociated with my life, whether we have been friends for years or 5 minutes.  Frankly I’m sick of it, and I’m sticking up for myself now.  Recently the last straw was broken and now I want almost nothing to do with those who have used me for their own personal gain.  I’m not going to be an asshole to people, that’s just not me or what I stand for.  It’s just now I’m growing a spine.  I’m also taking people out of my life who I don’t want to associate with any longer.  I’m still going to be caring and try to help people out but there are going to be some rules that I will tell you if you want me to do something for you.  As much of a dickhead sounding thing I’m about to type, its the truth I’ve come to realize, I need to look out for me before I stick my neck out for those who could care less about me.  We are alone in this world and the only people we can rely on is ourselves.

Guess I’m not strong enough.

After the hike today and talks with Nick, I’m in a far better mood.

This is just proof I should never get my hopes up, they only get crushed in the end.  Basically I’m done with trying so hard, it seems like nothing is really worth it anymore.  I thought I would have known better by now, but I guess I’m destined to make the same mistakes over and over and over again.  Well really the only bright side to this is I may have some inspiration for new songs even though they will have such a negative emotion connected to them.  This just reinforces that I should just stay in bed and hide, that’s the only way I can keep myself safe from this world.

A Post About Music Mostly

So I have like 3 new songs that are almost ready to record.  For some of them I wanna add a few other things, like melodica, electric guitar, or a solo or something. But I’m really excited to have the drive to record again.  I’m thinking of either doing a full length or an ep, it would just be released on bandcamp like the demos were.  I guess it all depends on what the songs are like quality wise and how they fit together.

But on a school note, I’m lagging again, I think that tonight I should do an essay, but I have a show where my friends are playing, so looks like Sunday is the day of working on a bunch of homework. Mainly because Saturday I have a show to go to again and I am chilling with someone and going to the show together :).